the ELLA echo

perspective from the sand

 "after a visit to the beach, it's hard to believe that we live in a material world."

pam shaw, independent national sales director for mary kay, inc.

a truly rich man

"a truly rich man is one whose children run into his arms when his hands are empty."

~author unknown

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!

wordless wednesday: fence walking

parenting lessons from max and ruby

 

whenever the topic of max and ruby comes up, the conversation goes in only two directions:

1. why is ruby so bossy???
2. where are their parents???

there is much clucking and tsk-tsk-tsking about how irresponsible the creator of the cartoon is for not having max and ruby's parents be more present, and about how ruby needs to be put back in line and about how if THEY (the cluckers) were max and ruby's parents they would NEVER put up with those kinds of shenanigans....

but when i see this show, i see a reflection of my own life, and wisdom to guide me to being a better parent.

here are two children solving their problems on their own, not running to their parents to settle every dispute or to fix what is broken, getting along for the most part and not being a bother to anybody. basically, they are modeling the kind of behaviour that most parents i know long for from their own children.

and are their parents really not there?  how do we know they're not just in the next room?  that happens a lot around here, and at ruby's age a kid is often expected/required to spend a lot of time keeping herself and her siblings occupied while the parent on duty folds some laundry, fixes a meal, or makes a phone call.  

ruby never asks max to do anything unsafe, never asks him to do a job that she should be doing, never asks him to do something they've been told not to do. instead, she simply asks him to do what any reasonable adult would ask--don't mess up my stuff.  stay over there and play with this thing while i take care of my responsibilities (see above).  help me finish this job so we can play together.

ruby never raises her voice.  ruby never complains about how much she has to do or how unfair it is that little max doesn't have as much expected of him. and ruby never belittles max for his actions even when they interfere with her fun.  however i have seen and heard grown adults getting very upset about how "bossy" ruby is, seemingly having forgotten that 3-year-old children can often be "a handful" even for their own parents.

meanwhile--has anybody noticed that max always comes to the rescue???  he's the hero of the pair, he's the one that solves the problem or finds the missing object or makes things work out for the best.  so far not one clucker i've spoken with has mentioned this.

as parents we tend to focus on the parts of life that are bothersome--we get worked up about "another" diaper or "another" spill, "another" lost item or "another" interruption.  

but when things go smoothly--when the kids get along and nobody gets hurt and even when one of them takes care of the other without us nagging about it--we tend not to notice because we are distracted by the OTHER stuff.  

whenever i'm distracted by that other stuff, max and ruby put me back on track.  they remind me to not jump to conclusions, because not everything is as it appears.  they help me remember that bigger kids can be helpful, resourceful, and trustworthy.  and they show me that even little kids can take care of business--if we let them.

*what kids' show helps you be a better parent?   

we all stumble

 "remember, we all stumble, every one of us.  that's why it's a comfort to go hand in hand."

emily kimbrough, author and lecturer

weekly wrap-up: butterflies! and a short summary of spring

in april there was easter:

 

 

and we visited with long-lost, beloved friends:

and we planted our gardens.

 

 

 

in may--there was a 500-year flood.  

luckily we were spared the worst of it.  so we spent the rest of the month doing whatever we could to help our community--making sandwiches and delivering cleaning supplies and helping people get their basic needs met--there was no time for blogging.

it's june now--life in nashville is still not back to normal and won't be for some time, but our little family is blessed to be safe and sound and we march on.

so that's the catch up.

now, inspired by the wonderful blog weird, unsocialized homeschoolers, from time to time i'm going to post a weekly wrap-up of what we've done here, homeschooling and otherwise.

this week it has been all about painted lady BUTTERFLIES.  thanks to the good folks in the advertizing department of PBS sprout :)  ella was bombarded with promos for the live butterfly garden from insect lore, so finally we ordered one and my only regret is that we didn't do it sooner.  

this has been so much fun!  however it really isn't for the squeamish.  the would-be butterflies come as tiny caterpillers in a jar with their food, and as they grow the jar becomes, let's just say, a little "messy".  then once they form their chrysalides (i didn't know that was the plural either) you have to transfer them to their habitat--you have to open that messy jar and put your hand in to do this. it isn't hard but it is a little scary because you'll have these five small, fragile, helpless little would-be butterflies attached by their small, fragile, helpless little "stems", and if you knock one off you will have to try to save it and that means TOUCHING IT with your big, clumpsy, germ-ridden hands and you WILL feel responsible if they don't make it.

but when they DO make it--WOW!  we currently have 8 out of 10 butterflies hatched or emerged or whatever it is called, and we can clearly see the other two inside their chysalides getting ready to spring forth in all their butterfly glory.  (in fact, one is wiggling loose as i type this!)

  

now, if i were a good little homeschool mommy i probably would have had ella create a butterfly journal where she could have documented what she observed and recorded each stage of development and then captured the experience in her own words.  in other words, i could have sucked the life right out of the whole thing.  maybe next time.  :)

instead, we just watched, discussed, and enjoyed.  we also learned--we just didn't turn it into a "learning experience".  

we are definitely going to order more caterpillers this summer--but first, ella wants to grow some ladybugs.  my garden is going to be very grateful.

*have you raised a butterfly or other insect?  what suggestions do you have for someone just getting started?

wordless wednesday: the round-a-round